But before I get on with my venting I have to address the issue of Dijeree Doo (I know I'm spelling that wrong but haven't had time to look it up). That is what we have tentatively named our rescue cat who is now attacking my foot with kitten-like fury. We rescued him out of a deep crate in the corner of the work shop, apparently abandoned by his mother (actually I don't know how to tell if it's he or she so we go with he). Anyway, with a new baby and an aggressive toddler in the house, this poor kitty is not getting the TLC it deserves and needs a new home. Any takers? Besides which, our fat cat, Kyoto, has taken a dislike to this little intruder and has not yet attacked though I do fear the day is approaching...
Now on with the venting. What's with all these newly developed parenting techniques that are supposed to make my life easier, I mean the ones that have been cropping up in the past 150 years or so. Kind of like how communication technology is supposed to bring people closer together. As if! I've never been so alone in my life and it's only getting worse. I could easily go a whole month without seeing a single member of my extended family or a single close friend, the kind I feel comfortable having a real conversation with. I blame the industrial revolution and the dissolution of the extended family. Honestly, why can't we all go back to cave man style parenting. I mean it worked for thousands of years, why do things have to change when I come along. I think I should have lived 2000 years ago, living on nuts and berries, spinning and weaving sturdy garments, washing wood smoke out of my hair with home-made soap, and chanting hymns to the full moon. Anyway, back to parenting, my world, life, and pet peeve right now. I feel like I am a little lonely boat in a huge empty ocean when it comes to "attachment parenting", a coined term that I've discovered most accurately represents my parenting philosophy. In a nutshell, let your kids sleep where they're comfortable and feel safe (with you, in your bed), feed your baby as much as he wants when he wants cause his body knows best, take your kids with you when you go places (carry baby in a sling), birth your babies at home (if you can), and don't count only on the school ciriculum to teach your kids, teach them what you know too. As simple as that all may sound to the non-parent, would you believe how much I have had to defend these convictions. If not out-loud (and usually I don't have the energy to argue my case) then I defend them in my mind which eventually leads to a mentality of constant defensiveness. Not really what I had in mind when I first became a parent. Like I said though, I feel pretty much alone on the whole matter, not that I critisize the parents that I know cause everyone must follow their own inner light, but I guess one is always surprise to find themselves travelling a path alone when they thought they were following a well-trodden course. Most likely my parenting convictions will change as I become older and wiser. Perhaps I will become a shining light so someone who also feels alone. There, I vented, aaaaaah! (I think that was the sound of a sigh of relief from my husband who was just saved from being a vent venue for the day) By the way, the picture way up there is of Lucas with his dad in bed, eating popcorn, with Lucas making his last clever attempts to resist bedtime. Yes, that is a queen sized bed that we ALL share with no difficulty, Lucas (18 months), Rowan (3 weeks) and their happy parents.
You are not the only one! I would add to your list 'allowing your child to discover his world and develop his interests and abilities'. It's interesting how when you pick them up and nurse them you are spoiling them, and then when they venture to climb up a latter while cherry picking because they are confident from always being so comforted you are neglecting them. Here's to spoiling with love (as if true love could ever be a bad thing) and purposeful neglect. Keep up the good work!
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